"New opinions and thoughts are the hardest to accept."
At the time when I heard it, I applied it to being a missionary, and to understand and not feel bad when I was rejected at a door, or talking to someone that didn't grow up being a member of the particular faith of mine. I understood that a lot of people were happy where they were in life, and that even though it doesn't happen often, at least in the greater Detroit area, there are people that are searching for something to help them in this life, because things are hard. It wasn't often to talk to someone seriously about it, but when it did, I felt happy to bring something that makes my life better in a lot of ways. I promise that this isn't a missionary post.
I believe that we are the people that we have become in this life because of hundreds of thousands, if not a million outside sources where we are taught and have experiences, and nobody has the exact same thoughts, feelings or ideas. For example, my cousin introduced me to an awesome Punk Rock band, The Mr. T Experience. When I was introduced to them, I loved their creativity and their music, which between them and the Beatles, I was inspired to learn how to play the guitar, which has opened so many doors throughout my life, and that experience helped me find a lot of new music and genres of music, as well as creative writing.
Nobody sees and understands me completely because they haven't experienced the same things I have in my lifetime. I am four months short from turning 40 years old. I was raised in the LDS Church and have just about always been an active member. I'm not saying I am better or understand others better, because I don't, but my life experiences between school, church, family and friends have shaped me into who I am.
I say this because I was reminded a few days ago that I need to try and understand others better. Just like people in Detroit that may have a great faith that they believe in that makes them good people too. I have a good friend, whose corner I am always in, but I hurt his feelings because I wasn't reaching out trying to understand him. I feel so bad about it. It wasn't right for me to tell him things that I did. He's having a hard time, and I didn't really try to understand his point of view. I'm close to twice his age, and I was raised in a very different situation and have experienced things that he will never experience or understand, but for me, I started thinking about that quote.
His experiences in life, since they have been different, has me looking at things from different perspectives, and those opinions and thoughts are hard for me to understand, not because I don't want to, but again, the quote, those differences are hard for me to understand because I haven't experienced the same things in my life that he has. I have ideas and thoughts that can almost be a 180 degree turn from his thoughts and feelings and ideas.
I don't think that is wrong of him, or me, to have those ideas and thoughts based on our experiences, and I realized that sometimes, it can be hard to put your personal thoughts and ideas away, and just listen and try to understand to the best of your ability without coming across like you are judging someone for having different thoughts and ideas and feelings. It's not our job as humans to judge one another, even if it's by accident.
I titled this post Breaking Down and Building Back Up, because I'm trying to try and put my life experiences and thoughts and ideas aside, and just be a good friend, despite our differences. I've never experienced things he has, and he hasn't experienced things I have. I'm trying to break myself down to a point where I can try to build up new ideas and opinions that will help me be a better friend or person. That's not to say that I don't have to agree with everything, but understanding is more important, I think. I may never understand exactly how people feel because I can only understand myself. I haven't had the same good and bad experiences in life that other people have. Some things are hard to understand because sometimes they aren't my reality. I can't fully understand feelings someone else may be having because I haven't had them. I don't know what things are like for other people. It's not fair to judge anyone based on just your own experiences.
I may not understand things to the degrees others may see and understand them. I think the best we can do as humans, is to try and care, respect and love people of all walks of life. That's way easier said than done. I'm not close to actually living and thinking that way all of the time, but I'm trying. I'm trying really hard.
I'm so lucky that I have you, and all of my friends and family, and outside influences that have built me up to be the person I am. All of the good and bad things that have happened to me have been for the better, even though bad stuff sucks sometimes. I have Asperger's Syndrome, and I don't expect anyone to completely understand me at times. I am grateful that my case of Asperger's Syndrome is mild. I have friends and family who have children who have sever cases of Asperger's Syndrome. I can understand their troubles a little bit, because I know my experiences with it, but I can't fully understand what it is like to have a child with a sever case of Asperger's and all of the things my friends and family have to do and learn.
I'm grateful for all of you for being my friends and family, no matter what race, language, locations, sexuality, religion, or belief system you are apart of. You are apart of me, I am the better for it. Please be kind to everyone, wear your masks so the COVID-19 cases don't include you. I need to get off to bed. I will write again in a few days! Until then, Peace Out!!!
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